They just keep coming, and I can't stop them. Time passes, I get older, my kids keep moving on... Every flippin' year I hear these words come out of my mouth - "Wow, so much has happened this year!" And so it goes...those milestones roll right over me every time. I'm going to start calling them mileboulders,
Claire's college softball team, in 5th place in their league at the end of the season, came from behind to WIN their league tournament, meaning they move on to Regionals this weekend. It's like being in the finals or going to Hollywood on Idol. Only 64 teams out of ALL Division 1 college softball teams in the nation get to be in regionals. Even more amazing, at least six of her travel ball teammates from high school days are also in regional tournaments, each at a different one around the nation. I am so excited for her and her team I want to burst! Long ago I said we'd go watch the games if they made it, but the reality is that this is her senior year, so I've flown back to Chicago for Senior Day games, and then the Banquet two weeks later. Oh, and both her dad and I spent a week there in April during my spring break from teaching for a home stand of six games. I LOVE Chicago. The reality is that we didn't count on the underdogs actually winning (for the first time in 7 years!) and we are tapped out - of money and of energy. I tried, we waited to see if the games would be in or near Chicago (or on the off chance the stars truly were aligned, in California), but no, Cal is actually traveling to Louisville along with my Flames girls and another team. Okay, maybe there would be a last minute really cheap flight....Nope, unless you consider $500-1,000 cheap. Maybe I'd have enough points on my card to buy a ticket or two....Nope, used them on the last three flights I've taken. Then maybe my friend can get us standby on a flight....Nope, flights are really full, and there's never a guarantee of getting a seat on one anyway.
I'm a big believer in what is meant to be is meant to be, and things happen for a reason, so I've decided to stop trying, to stop spending hours in front of the computer screen putting in various routes (now if I just try one way to Louisville, no, maybe Indianapolis, then back via Chicago...) on various websites, waiting for that really good deal to flash on the screen. I'll stop thinking about renting a car or bumming a ride. I'll stop thinking this is about my daughter and her disappointment at her parents not being at her big games. Besides, I have another daughter, and she's got a few milestones of her own rolling swiftly upon us that I don't want to miss. Next week is graduation from high school, in a few weeks I will go with her for her college orientation. Then there is moving her into the dorms. Wow, boulders for sure.
This is about them, their lives, not mine. I actually don't have any recollection of my parents even entering my personal space much during my high school/college years. Except the day I got married, yah, pretty sure they were there for that. When I was that age it was all about me, my friends, and my boyfriend(s). Everything was a big deal, and it meant everything to me that my best friend was there. My parents? Not so much.
I know she'll survive and thrive without me there in person on the sidelines cheering her on. I hope that by now she knows, they all know, that I am always their biggest fan, from anywhere in the world. Not sure that I will survive, however, without some bumps and bruises. Maybe just one last look at Priceline....
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