I am continually surprised by my kids. Today my son, who I know loves food and enjoys cooking, was sitting at his computer (where he is 80% of the time) and asked me what "minced" means. I had to think because my frame of reference was he was on the computer so what could he possible be talking about? Did he mean as in "mincing your words"? No, he had actually looked up some recipes on line and made a list for the grocery store (on his Droid phone) and said he'd be cooking these tonight. This is my grown son who will soon be leaving to start his career and live alone in an apartment 4 1/2 hours away. I'm starting to think that the Cuisinart electric chopper I picked up for him on a whim for Christmas was a good choice!
I discovered something new about my youngest lately. She has always been sensitive, and our relationship tends to be a reactive one so I don't often see beyond the angry teenager. Quite by accident, I discovered that my girl is a blogger. She is a creative thinker, has amazing insight, and an eye for beauty and simple messages that touch the heart of an issue. Her blog is full of visual poetry and wise words, some her own, some she has taken for her own. The world view she chooses and the issues she champions are close to my heart. I think she's gonna be okay.
Now I wonder why this growth, these discoveries are so amazing to me? As parents do we expect the minimum, or in the case of a late-night phone call, the worst? Is this so we are not disappointed or shocked when the news really is bad? Why am I surprised that my son is willing to make a meal on the spur of the moment for his family, or that my daughter loves language and words and takes a stand on issues she feels strongly about? Weren't these things that I was shooting for in my parenting style? Independence, creativity, morals. I sit back, amazed that these exceptional human beings came from their father and I, that we didn't screw them up too badly with all of our stumbling about, arguments about money, grades, cars, curfews, allowances, and our own indecision and questioning of almost every decision (especially through the teen years) we made regarding the kids. I've told my them, and may have mentioned once or twice (or a million times) here, that 'they' don't require a degree or a license to have children. A baby doesn't come with a manual. Parents love them and do their best, the hopeful result being an independent and productive member of society who is a good person, too. Oh, and happy, we want them to be happy.
Apparently food and poetry are high on the list of things that make my kids happy. Hmmm, those things are pretty high on my own list of things that make me smile. Wine, too. But that's another blog for another day.
